TOFFEARS
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184

2/20/2020

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...the greatest curse of Time is regret

​...Toffears
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182

2/5/2020

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...Building upon defeat.
In the Song of Faith,
lie the words of Treason and Deceit.
All capable,
all willing.
For our own gain,
all our own doing.
 
...Building upon deceit.
In the Song of Fate,
lies, undetermined
and unexpected,
commandeering Blindness,
leaving Belief begging for an answer.
 
...Building upon belief.
In the Song of Life,
lies Love,
on the river bed,
towards the surface,
towards the sun,
with the Only,
with the One.
 
...Building upon relief.
In the Song of Death,
lie memories departed
and the promise of Darkness.
But a step forward
to a sphere or a coil,
freedom and fear
be the Sun.
 
...We are but stealing upon defeat.

...Toffears

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181

1/10/2020

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...with weary steps and mindless breath,
unto the day, ongoing Death,
finding a crown,
following suit,
query be damned,
forbidden fruit.

...Toffears
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179

1/3/2020

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...in the quiet of the mind,
lies the mending of the heart.


...Toffears
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176

12/28/2019

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...how can you look at the bloodshot sunrise
after a night of silence?
 
So far away from mercy…
So far away, forgive me...


...Toffears
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167

11/29/2019

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...and so,
who will come to my funeral
when even I will not attend?


Ashes,
lying here
by the water,
from a life 
left unconsumed.

I am lying,
here,
early morning,
by the temple
that was you.

                               ...Toffears
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164

10/27/2019

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I am looking out the window,
Waiting for the rain.
I play the guest to my own downfall,
At my expense
I play the game.
 
I see the future crawling
The further on I go.
The old cigars,
The dampened room,
The sun has set,
The rivers flow.
 
I am looking out the window,
This was the view throughout my youth,
Did I escape
or did I fall?
Yet, brick by brick, I build the wall.
 
I see the world is yearning,
Oh, round and round I go…
This gilded cage has no escape,
They’ve lost the key,
But there is hope.
 
I am looking out the window,
somehow it always seems to rain…
I long for change,
I long for snow,
I long to live…
…I long to go.

                                               ...Toffears
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163

10/10/2019

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...Beat
and I breathe.

...Beat
and I breathe.

Deeply,
take a breath.

Beat,
and I focus,
I believe.

Breathe
and I live.
Breathe and be.

...Beat
and I breathe.

...Beat
and I breathe.

...and it Stops...
I had no control.

eXit


                       ...Toffears
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161

9/30/2019

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...I bore my name in the land of my birth.
I had no choice, but I was honoured.

Such hate, with words only...
Blame, Whispers, Hearsay...
Jealousy.

Enmity,
by birth,
by name...
For this dominion...
This land that we both craved.

And though my heart stopped beating
for no other reasons
             than that of my birth,
             than that of my name,
             than for this dominion,
             this land that is now my grave,
my watch never stopped ticking,
those guns never stopped firing.


Time soon drew a blank.
Unobtrusively, we became Anonymous.
A footnote in a history book.


Let it be said:
         The last culture on Earth will have nothing to share.
​
                                                                                 ...Toffears
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160

9/28/2019

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...A life,
a Birth
and a Cause.

Strong be my beliefs,
still I feud and brawl
to be granted but a few more years.

Still the heart is feeble.
And then... the Question...

                                             ...Toffears

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157

9/22/2019

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...When is the last time you felt free?

               ...Yesterday, when I wrote it.

                                             
                      
​                                               ...Toffears
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156

9/20/2019

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...For every life...

Is your belief 
blind enough
for you to hate the sunrise?

                               ...Toffears

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154

9/16/2019

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...Light a candle and it burns,
they say.

Left or right,
and at the Summit,
I found no trace
but for a worthless headstone
and a hole in the ground.

For what were we expecting
when we resolved to live?

                                     ...Toffears
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153

9/12/2019

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...All the more fleeting
than Memory and Life,
this Desert bares no Shifting Sands,
no Caravans,
no Horizon.
 
So soon here,
So soon forgotten.
 
No matter how fatalist one may be,
There is always hope.

...allegiance to the Servitude of Self
bares no Honour.

                                             ...Toffears
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152

9/10/2019

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...walls surrounding,
no protection,
isolation.

...narrowing echo,
fears grown,
isolated.

...worthless Life,
painless,
pointless,
segregation.

             ...Toffears


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149

9/6/2019

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...blossom anew,
by the window,
by the door.

A letter, signed.

The famine struck,
Dominions and Dust.
So were we.

                    ...Toffears
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146

8/30/2019

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...of everything,
I have only touched the surface.

Deeper passion,
like a Prison to the sun
of which I am now sentenced.

Of everything,
I only took a glance.

                               ...Toffears
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145

8/28/2019

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...this is where they brought me,
this is where I stood.

My name, gone,
lost
along with any memories of my voice.

                                              ...Toffears


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144

8/26/2019

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...between the Self,
Pure Nature,
the Entertaining World is thin, but solid.

Realise, Break.

Facing foul windows,
Open spaces,
undefined...

Violence,
self-made.

                                                  ...Toffears
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143

8/22/2019

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...every emotion you feel
is of your own creation.

You cannot hide from yourself
as you do from a mirror...

                                    ...Toffears
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142

8/20/2019

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...in the colours of the clouds,
carving through Winds,
I came upon a hill
of broken light and melted sand.

How could I see the fields below?

Where once walked a human being,
now rose an empty Soul
ready for the tender noose
of slavery to the Social Demands and Expectations
of people I hated.

How beautiful was the wintered breeze of Dawn.

                                                                     ...Toffears
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140

8/16/2019

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...we watched it burn,
all of it.
Gone,
rather than let it fall and be soiled.

"I wish I were 20 years younger"

We watched it burn.
All of it,
lost and wasted.

                                          ...Toffears



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137

8/10/2019

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...Words and Bullets
at the speed of Sound,
Hailstorm, Hailstorm,
come the Summer breeze
followed by the sun.

                            ...Toffears

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136

8/8/2019

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...and beyond the lies, you answer...

"Waste no Time...
For you have left
a Perishable Body
in a premeditated act
worthy of a confession..."

                                         ...Toffears

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135

8/6/2019

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...links be cut...

Isolation,
Emancipation,
Liberation.

A name uttered...

Failing contact.

              ...Toffears
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    • ...towards the theatre of Self
    • ...it was a rainbow in the Night
    • ...Biennale Architettura 2018
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